Thoughts while Traveling

That is what I have felt this week has been. Attempting relentlessly to push out of my mind the fact that when these days in the sun are behind me , what awaits me at home is a mess that needs sifting through. It is our last day of vacation and I am in the Outer Banks bookstore making use of the internet provided for me at a small cost. I have succeeded in relaxing most of the time, however like the current of the mighty ocean that has tried to take me out to sea several times this week, my underlying stress of the weekend to come has popped out of nowhere and taken shape in ways I wish I could have harnessed at the time. (holy run on sentence...)

Translation: I'm sorry~ for what it is worth.

It's funny. We wait a whole year for this one week where we can throw all of our anxiety to the wind...and then it's almost over and I feel like crying because it came back unexpectedly and without warning. That's my flesh I suppose---good thing God keeps pouring his grace on me and lovingly reminds me that if I cast my cares on HIM and not into the wind, it won't whip around and bite me in the arse again. How thick - headed I am.

I love the ocean. And I love my family. Sometimes we get an illusion in our head about how things will be, and then they aren't quite so for some reason... because we aren't as others perceive us to be and they aren't what we perceive them to be? And the when we are thrown together the casserole doesn't quite taste the way it was supposed to? Life is funny. People are funny. We aren't coming from the same place as we once were? Life and experience has taught us different things ~ and the translation can get a little muddy. But I think that we know each other's hearts and in the end that will conquer...? I know, I am rediculous with my metaphors that only make sense to me, and then not really. The paragraph of questions...some I know the answer to and others I am cloudy as ever. I am just oozing out all that is swirling around in my brain, as mixed up as it is.

Good memories from this week: Hooplah, Harvey, good eating, smiling, sleep, Vitamin D, power outage, candles, good reads, friends, discovery, seeing my husband for more than an hour in the day, the best smoothie I've ever had...

In two days we will be vacated out of our little apartment and emerged into a new world~ in a new city with new places to explore. I will miss Ghent. The place that feels like home. It's only across the river, I have to keep reminding myself. Just a tunnel or a ferry ride away. Not too far from Kelly's Tavern and the Fairgrounds and Clay's. It's sad that we have just made friends with alot of our neighbors and now we are leaving.

Can't wait to see Nicole. Good times are ahead of us on Maryland Ave, girl. Just far enough away from the drama...

What am I doing? I have to get back to the beach! Only a few hours left...

adios.